You know what's great about raya this year?
My tailor screwed my baju raya - the baju is 5 inches longer (yes I MEASURED, and if you're familiar with the term inches you KNOW how labuh 5 inches is), the lengan part is 3 inches longer, and don't even get me started on the kain. People just have to come up with a new term of 'labuh' as to describe my situation right now.
We didn't get to buy any pelita, like how we used to every single year *cries*
We didn't get to buy extra baju kurung for raya due to damn work and people closing the boutiques early. I mean, what is it with boutiques nowadays?! If I have to come and buy baju kurung at 10 pm, would you really refuse a customer?
OK I might won't even open if it was my store. But seriously.
The fact that my sister has to go to her in-laws on pagi raya, when this year we managed to get everyone together wearing the same baju raya like how we used to. I mean really. I used to say I don't mind not having her on raya when she had to go to her in-laws, but this time it just feels different.
But really, apart from those things, I love everything about Ramadan and raya this year I don't know why. Ramadan feels a lot shorter compared to before but I managed to do everything I've always wanted to do during Ramadan, and for the first time I'm contributing to the household as I've started getting my own income. It feels great; giving something out instead of always being the one getting something.
To tell you the truth, I'm all about it's-not-yours-if-it's-your-family's thing. Ever since I've gotten scholarship for study, asking Mum for money is like a taboo for me. Same goes to getting a car; it doesn't feel right driving Mum's car around and when people ask, "oh, yes, I have a car". It just doesn't feel right wearing Mum's branded bags. That's why when I managed to keep my money to buy albeit one designer bag, it makes me feel contented to know that it comes from my own money, not someone else's.
But this time, being able to chip in for my own household really gives me a whole new meaning of being a grown-up.
And that's why this year's Ramadan is great, for me.
...nowadays is probably, going to the grave.
Oh how I miss being there. As weird as it sounds.
I regret for putting it off, day by day, week by week just because I've been so busy with work. I regret for not making it a primary thing in my life like how it used to be. I regret for not making time and making excuses about time. I regret for waiting too long.
God, please forgive me. Please forgive all my sins; for I'm just a weak human being who still needs Your guidance and patience and care. Give me Your hidayah and blessings, for I really need Your help to be in the right path and be the better person I know I want to be. I still need You to guide me, for at times I tend to make this world my priority when I'm supposed to look for Your love above everything else.
And most of all, please don't make me forget where I come from.
Started my Raya holiday yesterday evening after taking off from work at 4.30 pm, which is a first for me. Had to rush off to this interview and as soon it ended, it felt like a huge burden is off my chest.
To top it all off, Mum came to fetch me after work and we had iftar together before going home.
When things get hard, spending time with Mum is all I need to bounce back, I swear.
As childish as it sounds.
I was downloading songs to fill my phone's 16 GB SD card (yes I'm an avid iPod lover, the girl with earphone 24/7) when I realized that, it's been quite 6 months since I last play guitar.
Stopped playing before due to my FYP craziness, then when I cut my finger I couldn't play at all since the cut was right on the finger I used for playing chords - hence making it impossible for me to even get the right sound for chords. Well, it's not like I've always played the right ones anyway - my G chord sounds suspiciously off tune.
But last weekend when I go back home to my old room, the sight of my untouched guitar kinda makes me sad. Back in Japan, playing guitar was always the one thing that could make all the difference. I remember that one day during summer break, I could ride my bike to that instrument shop a few blocks down just to get the guitar eventhough I had no idea how to play. Insisted my sister to teach through webcam, and she sent me this DVD on learning how to play for beginners; though eventually I learned to play through Youtube.
It was pure fun. Screw that I don't have Rihanna's perfect pitch voice, I'd learn to play in bathroom instead.
I think that's when I developed my love for Youtube singers.
I wish I hadn't stopped playing. I wish I had more hours in a day to allocate for playing; nowadays it is just impossible to spend some time watching TV, let alone playing guitar!
But most of all, I wish I hadn't give up.
So my new resolution is, giving that poor abandoned thing at the corner of my room a chance.
Anyway. Have you listened to Rihanna's California King Bed?
I wasn't following their channel or anything, but I stumbled upon this video and found it so impressive. Heck, 99.9% of Youtube talents are way better than the crap sound I used to produce (99.9% because I once found this girl's video of her trying to make sound of her guitar - not a success, unfortunately.) so it's not hard to impress me.
Stopped playing before due to my FYP craziness, then when I cut my finger I couldn't play at all since the cut was right on the finger I used for playing chords - hence making it impossible for me to even get the right sound for chords. Well, it's not like I've always played the right ones anyway - my G chord sounds suspiciously off tune.
But last weekend when I go back home to my old room, the sight of my untouched guitar kinda makes me sad. Back in Japan, playing guitar was always the one thing that could make all the difference. I remember that one day during summer break, I could ride my bike to that instrument shop a few blocks down just to get the guitar eventhough I had no idea how to play. Insisted my sister to teach through webcam, and she sent me this DVD on learning how to play for beginners; though eventually I learned to play through Youtube.
It was pure fun. Screw that I don't have Rihanna's perfect pitch voice, I'd learn to play in bathroom instead.
I think that's when I developed my love for Youtube singers.
I wish I hadn't stopped playing. I wish I had more hours in a day to allocate for playing; nowadays it is just impossible to spend some time watching TV, let alone playing guitar!
But most of all, I wish I hadn't give up.
So my new resolution is, giving that poor abandoned thing at the corner of my room a chance.
Anyway. Have you listened to Rihanna's California King Bed?
I wasn't following their channel or anything, but I stumbled upon this video and found it so impressive. Heck, 99.9% of Youtube talents are way better than the crap sound I used to produce (99.9% because I once found this girl's video of her trying to make sound of her guitar - not a success, unfortunately.) so it's not hard to impress me.
Yesterday when I was about to head back to Penang, I looked for my cat to say goodbye.
And you know where I found him?
I swear my cat is so weird.
He's been sick all week, and hasn't been able to eat anything. I kept umpan-ing him with tuna instead of Whiskas, but he still refused to eat.
He rarely fell sick, so I get so worried that I keep him sleeping on my bed every night - the one thing I always got yelled at for doing. But really, I've lost my cats before that I really really don't wanna lose another again.
And you know where I found him?
Happily snuggled in a blanket of my towels and white linens in my wardrobe.
He's been sick all week, and hasn't been able to eat anything. I kept umpan-ing him with tuna instead of Whiskas, but he still refused to eat.
He rarely fell sick, so I get so worried that I keep him sleeping on my bed every night - the one thing I always got yelled at for doing. But really, I've lost my cats before that I really really don't wanna lose another again.
That's him in my wardrobe -___-
Anyway, I decided it was time for me to treat the whole family for iftar.
I KNOW RIGHT!! This whole thing is reallyy making me feel like a grown up already. Sniffs. Mum actually HAD to remind me that I'm not going to be given duit raya anymore, since it's my turn this year to be the one giving it.
This whole working thing is really, really annoying.
...he bought me books to study.
I mean, really, who else does that?? Haha.
OK fine, I asked for it.
I got a parcel from Japan yesterday, and it threw me to the moon. A few weeks ago I asked Shahrul about SD cards price there, since I refused to buy a new one for my phone (having SD card-oriented phones is still a foreign concept to me) and he told me there's a 800+ yen 16 GB SD card on Amazon Japan.
That's like, RM30.
And when I went to the store here to check out the price, an 8GB SD card would cost RM128 (approximately).
That's a freaking 100 bucks difference!! Freaking unbelievable.
Once, I went to the store to buy my Canon printer's ink, and what would cost me around 20 bucks in Japan, is actually over 120 bucks here. I almost got a heart attack!! Complained to Mum, and she said "well maybe that's where Canon factories come from hence cheaper" pfft doesn't help at all.
So of course, I resorted to asking him to buy me the 16 GB SD card and send to me. Even after shipping cost (around 30 bucks) I can get it cheaper.
As for the books, I've been thinking of taking a Japanese proficiency test for a while, so he sent me the books to study for the exam as recommended by our sensei. Am so touched. Managed to read till fifth page, loving the book already! It's easy to understand and also got English translation.
Study mode ON.
And to top it all off, there's a hard disk containing all my favorite movies and drama - Modern Family, Prison Break, The Hangover, some japanese movies and drama, Con Air, Die Hard, etc - because I've complained about how slow streamyx is here. Must've taken him days to download those 250 GB worth of files..well, at least he saved that streamyx guy from getting an earload of complaints.
To you, thank you for the parcel!! :)) Will send you the condensed milk and Maggi parcel after this okay?
I mean, really, who else does that?? Haha.
OK fine, I asked for it.
I got a parcel from Japan yesterday, and it threw me to the moon. A few weeks ago I asked Shahrul about SD cards price there, since I refused to buy a new one for my phone (having SD card-oriented phones is still a foreign concept to me) and he told me there's a 800+ yen 16 GB SD card on Amazon Japan.
That's like, RM30.
And when I went to the store here to check out the price, an 8GB SD card would cost RM128 (approximately).
That's a freaking 100 bucks difference!! Freaking unbelievable.
Once, I went to the store to buy my Canon printer's ink, and what would cost me around 20 bucks in Japan, is actually over 120 bucks here. I almost got a heart attack!! Complained to Mum, and she said "well maybe that's where Canon factories come from hence cheaper" pfft doesn't help at all.
So of course, I resorted to asking him to buy me the 16 GB SD card and send to me. Even after shipping cost (around 30 bucks) I can get it cheaper.
As for the books, I've been thinking of taking a Japanese proficiency test for a while, so he sent me the books to study for the exam as recommended by our sensei. Am so touched. Managed to read till fifth page, loving the book already! It's easy to understand and also got English translation.
Study mode ON.
And to top it all off, there's a hard disk containing all my favorite movies and drama - Modern Family, Prison Break, The Hangover, some japanese movies and drama, Con Air, Die Hard, etc - because I've complained about how slow streamyx is here. Must've taken him days to download those 250 GB worth of files..well, at least he saved that streamyx guy from getting an earload of complaints.
To you, thank you for the parcel!! :)) Will send you the condensed milk and Maggi parcel after this okay?
As of this week, it just hit me that I've been employed for 3 months already.
Time flies fast is the understatement of the century.
I didn't think I'd get through these past months without much breakdowns and complaints. Well, yes, I've had my fair share of those (just ask him) and there are times when I thought, all I wanted in life is go home and lie in bed all day watching TV without having to worry about production yield or defects root cause or simulation or anything.
And that's when reality kicks my ass real hard.
And that's when I'm thinking of studying again.
Studying was probably the most hated thing in my life; and yet the times I've spent doing it was the most fun I've ever had. I've learned that I found Maths very fascinating; I've always loved Add Maths (as geeky as I can possibly sound, I know) that I could spend the entire day blasting off my speaker listening to music while doing questions in Algebra book. I've learned that I loved drawing chemical bonds till I ran out of papers. I've learned that I have a love-hate relationship with CAD; doing it for almost 12 hours non-stop was a torture but secretly when it's complete, I would look at the drawings and smile.
All those times when I reached home and it's already dark and I skipped meals and went to sleep. All those times when I took a nap till Isyak and woke up feeling all grumpy for missing those few hours to do homework. When final terms came and I've finished all papers and went home with that "OMG NO MORE PAPERSS" amazing feeling in my tummy.
I miss being a student. There's no other way to put it.
For now, I think I'm blessed not having to drag myself to work every weekend. For now, I think it's great that I'm surrounded with positive people who'd cheer up my most sucky day without them even knowing it.
For now, passing by the same beach by the highway on the way to office every morning and watching the sun rise are probably the highlights of my day.
But that feeling of having reality kicks again; oh boy.
I really don't like intervention.
Today, I saw this one funny cockroach on the road at my workplace (I KNOW RIGHT, what workplace got cockroaches?! Psshh disgusting) so I was about to take its photo and put it up on my Instagram. You know, so that all the strangers on Instagram can look/not look at your self-proclaimed photo collection.
Then I realized, I can't.
Man that feeling sucks.
It just didn't hit me how much I'd miss using my old phone with all the handy apps that came with it before, but I do now. While Android has finally heard my prayers and gave me Viber, oh how I wish they'd produce another Instagram for Android version.
Talk about not being grateful.
P/S : Happy Ramadan everyone! May this month brings more berkat and happiness for us all. Am super excited to welcome the holy month in Malaysia after 4 years :) I apologize for any of my wrongdoings; intentionally or not.
Then I realized, I can't.
Man that feeling sucks.
It just didn't hit me how much I'd miss using my old phone with all the handy apps that came with it before, but I do now. While Android has finally heard my prayers and gave me Viber, oh how I wish they'd produce another Instagram for Android version.
Talk about not being grateful.
I still miss my old phone :( Bloody Cydia ruined my happiness!! Tsk. If you guys know how to recover iPhone from damaged Cydia apps, tell me TELL MEE.
I miss playing Bejeweled on my bed while waiting for him to call. I miss browsing on its fine interface (Android interface still can't beat iOS', I think), I miss browsing iBags, I miss Tweetdeck, I miss Instagram!
Browsed Android's Market (sort of like App Store) and found this Lightbox app, claiming to be another Instagram-like app for Android.
So far I stay firm with pleading with the Instagram guys to make an Android version, cause Lightbox can never replace Instagram. Funny how an app can put me down so much.
And yes, this is just to say that being emotional over a loss is perfectly okay. Even if it came from snapping a picture of a cockroach.
P/S : Happy Ramadan everyone! May this month brings more berkat and happiness for us all. Am super excited to welcome the holy month in Malaysia after 4 years :) I apologize for any of my wrongdoings; intentionally or not.
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